Here we are, fourteen months later, and I’m still trying to make it make sense. But instead finding only dead end after dead end. Trying to figure out where the mistake was that made everything go wrong. Was it leaving the call center job in 2015? Not leaving it sooner? Taking that job at all? Or was it something else entirely not job related that I missed before that in college?

Worse, I seem to have lost a friend in the middle of all this. Some other mistake I made unintentionally, presumably something I said since we don’t see each other very often IRL without a pandemic, but now they seem to be gone and no way for me to repair the damage.

It seems the only thing I can succeed at, is being an utter failure.


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